


Operation Kei and The First Year Road Trip!

by ADyingFlower



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Breaking the Fourth Wall, Crack Treated Seriously, Epic Bromance, Fluff and Crack, Gen, HQ Brofest, HQ Brofest Rookie Tier, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kageyama Tobio is a Dork, Road Trips, Running Away, Tsukishima Kei is Bad at Feelings, Yachi Hitoka is an Angel, Yamaguchi Tadashi is a Little Shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 03:59:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10801236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ADyingFlower/pseuds/ADyingFlower
Summary: Tsukishima Kei is going on a roadtrip with the other first years. No, nothing to see here. They totally aren't running away from home for any strange, paranoid reason. Just a friendly bonding experience, you know, with all their things in the truck.Or;Hinata side-eyed him. “I’m not so sure about that. Specs is pretty-”Kei didn’t hesitate to hit him this time.“Driving!” Hinata yelped, speeding to prove his point even though they were literally two minutes from their next stop. “I’m the driver, I’m untouchable. Sothere.”“I have my permit.”“Fuck.”





	Operation Kei and The First Year Road Trip!

**Author's Note:**

> Fair warning, this is complete and utter _crack_ , or otherwise my really bad attempt at humor

They left before dawn. 

As a teenager who's been practically playing volleyball ever since he could walk (thank you so much for that Akiteru,  _ really _ ), Kei had no problem getting up without an alarm at whatever time he needed to. It was especially helpful during training camps, when he wanted to snag a good spot in the bathroom for a moment of privacy before the other idiots filed in and hogged all the sinks. Now he was using this well-honed skill of his to run away from home.

How the mighty have fallen.

He tugged the backpack strap higher up on his shoulder, back already protesting under the weight of two heavy bags and the last one looped around his hand. One held his clothes and other personal things of his, while another held blankets and a stocked to the brim medkit, and the last was practically overflowing with all the canned food he had snuck out of the pantry over the course of the last year. It was the last one that was straining his shoulder so badly, but the bag was too essential to their survival to risk putting it down and then possibly forgetting about it. Even he had moments of weakness, okay? 

Cautiously, Kei made his way out of his room, opening the door as silently as possible and slipping out on light feet. He paused when he passed by Akiteru's old room, but with a deep breath he continued on. His older brother would understand. He had to. Kei could explain more in detail why he was doing this when he was eighteen and untouchable, but not a minute beforehand. There was too much at risk for him to try and explain why he had to leave, why they  _ all  _ had to leave.

His mother was asleep on the kitchen table when he made his way downstairs, snoring slightly on her paperwork with a thin trail of drool decorating the cover of it. Kei let out a small chuckle at the sight and pushed the heavy thoughts of leaving out of his head, leaving the kitchen briefly in search of a blanket. He found one draped over the couch in the living room, folding it neatly over her shoulders so she wouldn’t get a chill. It was barely spring, and he wouldn’t be around any more to take care of her like this.

"Kei..?" His mother murmured sleepily, and he froze. "What are you...doing up?" 

Quickly gaining his composure, he lied straight through his teeth. "Just getting some water, Ka-san. You should go to bed, it's late."

She nodded sleepily, not even bothering to open her eyes. "I was gonna, don't stay up too late playing games, okay?" 

"Okay, Ka-san." He agreed, tightening his lips just the smallest amount. His mother felt around in the air until she found his face and kissed his check, before turning on her heel and unsteadily waddling back upstairs to her room, blanket still wrapped around her shoulders. Kei watched his mother go for what would probably be the last time in years before he shook his head and tightened his grip on the bag in his hand. 

This was no time for stupid sentiments to destroy months of planning, of hushed lunch conversations and afternoons spent checking their funds and rechecking again until they had saved up enough to last them. And here they were, and Kei wasn't going to let anything stop this plan of theirs. Not even his one and only mother, who would probably cry over his absence and wonder  _ why _ . 

Closing his eyes briefly, he straightened his back and left the kitchen, quietly praying that his family would one day forgive him for this. She had Akiteru, she would survive, like she had survived everything before this. 

Hinata was waiting outside when he slid into the passenger seat. His orange hair was badly dyed a more natural shade of brown, but his roots were still showing through and his eyebrows would give him away easily to anyone who was looking. Tossing two of the heavier bags by his feet, he rummaged through his clothes bag for a baseball cap and quickly slid it over Hinata’s head. 

“Thanks, Specs.” Hinata laughed as Kei sent him a glare, pulling away from the curb as quietly as possible and driving swiftly away from the house he had grown up in. He didn’t dare look back. “The haircut suits you. Makes you seem like a real bad boy.” 

“Yes, I instantly gained master knowledge on how to cut hair by simply breathing.” Kei scowled as Hinata let out another laugh, the shorter boy driving the car with a certain sense of certainty that was next to impossible to replicate. Months ago, he had barely any courage to even sit in the driver’s seat, but late nights of driving around the block and eventually the highway until he was comfortable helped him out a great deal. The former redhead was the only one of them with a license, so Kei picked his battles and helped when he can.

He could be nice sometimes, you know. Sometimes. 

“Still, I think you look nice.” Hinata smiled at him, and Kei could feel his ears turn a bit red even as he whipped his head around to stare out at the dark and empty streets instead of the literal ball of sunshine sitting in the driver’s seat, suppressing the urge to whip out sunglasses.

“Shut up,” Kei muttered, and, while Hinata didn’t say anything more, he could practically  _ feel _ his amusement. Brat. Idiot. 

Dammit, he’s softened up too much. Now they’re getting away with whatever they like, throwing compliments and easy affection around like it’s nothing.

A phone blinged, and Kei gave himself a neck ache with how fast he spun around in his seat to pin Hinata with his nastiest glare. And he had some nasty glares.

“Tell me,” he slowly said, and Hinata gulped nervously, looking on the verge of abandoning the car himself despite being the driver and owner of said car, “that you didn’t bring your phone with you.” 

Hinata lasted eighteen seconds before he broke. “I’m sorry, I just wanted to make sure we had something to call with if we ran into trouble-”

“And you didn’t turn it off?!” He would hit the former redhead if it  wasn’t for the fact he was driving. “How much of an idiot can you be?”

“I know, I’m sorry!” Hinata yelped, turning the corner a little more sharply than intended as they pulled in front of Yamaguchi’s house. 

Since they were now in park, Kei reached across the console and smacked Hinata’s leg right as Yamaguchi hurried out of his own house, no bags in sight. The mystery was quickly solved when he took a quick turn before entering the car and instead pulled two separate duffels out of bush near the walkway. Without further delay, the brunet slid into the backseat behind the drivers and Hinata took off as soon as the door was shut. No one wanted to be anywhere near that cursed house if Yamaguchi’s mom decided to wake up and grace them all with her  _ wonderful _ presence.

“Sorry.” Yamaguchi caught his breath, buckling himself up as he settled the bags at his feet. “There was no where else to hide the bags in case she decided to look through my things again.” 

Kei turned around in his seat to answer him, smirking slightly as Yamaguchi’s mouth dropped slightly as he got a good look at his new hairstyle. “Don’t worry about it.” 

“Tsukki!” Yamaguchi yelped and the car swerved the slightest bit from Hinata flinching at the noise. He cast them both a glare before the obvious amazement on Yamaguchi's part could be contained no longer and burst out in stardust-flavored excitement. “Your hair -- You have an undercut!” 

“And the shortie over here has brown hair, so?” Hinata braked so hard that Kei flew back and almost bashed his head on the dashboard while Yamaguchi did smash his face into the padded seat in front of him. 

“What were you saying about my height?” Hinata smiled at him with vacant eyes, and he chose to wisely shut up. 

It was a few more moments of rearranging their slightly bruised bodies before Yamaguchi dared to speak up again, unable to hold back his habit of nervous chatter. “I wish I had done something to my hair now, you two look like completely different people.” 

Kei and Hinata glanced at each other before Kei silently turned back to face Yamaguchi again. “We can cover up your freckles, if you want. They’re your most distinguishing feature.” 

Before Yamaguchi could try to melt through his seat in what seemed to be shame, which Kei didn’t really understand, Hinata decided to pipe up. “They are! They made you look super cute, and we can’t have that. The whole point of this is to seem as normal as possible, and being too cute isn’t allowed!”

This time, the red wasn’t out of shame, so Kei turned back around and opened one of Hinata’s bags. “That reminds me, I’m turning off your phone. We can keep it, but-” He interrupted Hinata’s squeal. “You have to keep it off so they can’t track it. We can turn it on in the future for emergencies, but you have to break it within ninety seconds if possible.” 

There was a moment of stunned silence.

“See!” Yamaguchi flailed an arm in his general direction. “Tsukki knows everything!” 

Hinata side-eyed him. “I’m not so sure about that. Specs is pretty-” 

Kei didn’t hesitate to hit him this time. 

“Driving!” Hinata yelped, speeding to prove his point even though they were literally two minutes from their next stop. “I’m the driver, I’m untouchable. So  _ there _ .” 

“I have my permit.” 

“Fuck.” 

Luckily (for Hinata at least), they pulled over in front of Kageyama’s house. Unlike Yamaguchi, the younger boy didn’t rush as he left the house and was quite obviously dressed for something a bit more durable than an early run. He jumped in across from Yamaguchi, dropping his duffel in the middle seat and fiddling with the volleyball in his lap. 

“You brought a volleyball? Really?” Kei raised an eyebrow at him as they started off for their last stop before the highway. Kageyama shrugged, stroking his thumb over the familiar leather and letting himself get lost in his thoughts. 

Or take a nap, either one. 

“Leave him alone, Specs.” Hinata whispered lowly, taking the onramp to the interstate towards the more populated part of Miyagi. “He’s had a past rough couple of weeks.” 

“As if I don’t know that,” he snapped more harshly than he meant to, but still kept his voice low. Of course he knew, why the hell would Hinata accuse him of that? Sure, he could admit he was an absolute asshole who probably had too many sadistic tendencies to be healthy, but he wasn’t insensitive. Geez, people, give him a break.  

After a moment, Hinata released the wheel with one hand and patted his clenched fist. Slowly, he relaxed just enough to fist bump Hinata’s waiting hand. Apology accepted, he supposed. 

“I’ll wake him up when we get to Yachi’s.” Yamaguchi volunteered, already moving both of their duffels behind them in the trunk. Kei nodded at him in thanks, and spent the rest of the ride shuffling their bags to the trunk rather than clog up space by their feet. The trunk was already rather filled with things Yamaguchi had smuggled in over the past couple of weeks. Practical things, like cooking utensils and futons, things Kageyama wouldn’t have thought of. 

Yachi was already waiting outside her apartment complex when they turned onto her road, dressed in a pale nightgown that wasn’t appropriate for the spring's chill if the way she was rubbing at her arms was any indicator. They had barely stopped before she was practically hurling herself into the warm vehicle, dropping her bags on a now very awake Kageyama and setting her bare legs on Yamaguchi’s lap. 

“Jesus,” she chattered, her teeth rattling faintly as she desperately rubbed circulation into her limbs. “Do any of you have a blanket or something?” 

They didn’t, but Kageyama slipped out of his jersey and handed it to her instead. She nodded her thanks, too absorbed into regaining warmth to fluster like she usually would. 

“What were you in your nightgown for?” Hinata frowned at the rear view mirror, and she sheepishly smiled back. 

“Takashi was around, so I didn’t want to change. I just barely made it out, and only because I slipped some of Mom’s sleeping pills in his water when he wasn’t looking,” she declared vehemently, and all four of them briefly stopped whatever they were doing to stare at her incredulously. Which caused the car to swerve in the incoming traffic lane and for everyone to see the light for a brief moment. 

Once Hinata had regained control of the car and had pulled over briefly to slump over the wheel as Kei berated him, he turned around to continue his interrogation of Yachi. 

“He didn’t do anything, right?” he demanded, keeping an eye on Hinata as he took the wheel again towards the highway. Yachi waved her hand at the question, already searching through her bag for something warmer. 

“Nothing more than usual,” she chirped brightly, and Kei had to resist the sentimental urge to tell her it was okay to be upset. Yamaguchi must have gotten the hint off his face or had the same train of thought, as he looped an arm around her shoulder and let her drop her face into his shoulder. It was a few moments of silence before shaky breaths filled the air, and, without a word, Hinata turned on the radio with a stoic face, eyes never leaving the road in front of them. 

Kei let out a small sigh. Five more hours. Just five more hours. Pulling out a small notebook, he let himself disappear into the finances of this ragtag group, casting one last look at the trio in the back who silently mourned the shared past they held. 

 

It was literally only an hour into the trip and Kei was regretting his  _ birth _ . 

Yachi, once she had wiped her tears away, had busied herself with opening the retractable roof. Well, Hinata  _ called _ it a retractable roof, but in all honesty it was just a perfect square window on the roof that could be opened if one were to put about a year's worth of elbow grease into it. She claimed it gave it a “roadtrip feel” and then proceeded to bug everyone into opening their windows. Yamaguchi gave in quickly because everyone and their mother knew he was weak to her, and the idiot duo gave in quickly afterwards because they were called idiots for a reason. 

And now the two of them were having a Mexican standoff in the middle of a car going eighty miles an hours. 

“Tsukishima,” she pleaded, turning her puppy dog eyes toward him. Dammit, he knew letting her spend too much time with Hinata was a bad idea, but did anyone listen? Noooooo. “Can you open your window for me? Please?” 

Kei narrowed his eyes, clutching his notebook closer to his chest. “No.” 

“C’mon, Specs.” Hinata jumped in, raising an eyebrow at him. “Listen to the girl; it’s only opening the window.”

He pressed the notebook closer. “No.” His finger was stubbornly pulling the window button up in case Hinata decided to take control from the driver's seat. He wasn’t having all his papers flying everywhere as it was bad enough having the wind from Hinata’s side of the car battering his face every time they accelerated above forty, which was always. 

A hand came down on Yachi’s shoulder, tugging her back in her seat and not halfway over the center console like she was previously. She landed with a little “oomph,” automatically batting at the person who pulled her back, who was surprisingly Kageyama. 

“Leave him alone,” he muttered, still half awake. “Grumpy needs some sleep.” 

Kei turned around partially to glare daggers at the shorter boy. “I do not-” Kageyama reached forward and snaked his arm around the headrest, sliding a hand right over his eyes. 

“Sleep,” he commanded, not in any sense lucid, and the only reason Kei didn’t smack the hand away was because he was a  _ bit _ tired. Not much, mind you, but he did get a bit nervous last night and had some trouble sleeping for the last couple of days. Still.

“Shut up, stupid king.” But he didn’t bat away the hand, letting himself at least relax into the seat while Yamaguchi idly chatted with Hinata about the latest volleyball game. 

He must have fallen asleep, as when he woke up, Yachi had a bag from the trunk on her lap and the radio was quietly playing once more, some pop song that had Hinata occasionally mouthing the lyrics.

“It’s been only like an hour and a half.” Yamaguchi answered his unspoken question, offering him a water bottle. He gratefully took it and quickly handed it back, eyeing how Yachi was somehow putting on clothes without once removing her nightgown and how Kageyama was slumped against the back of Kei’s seat, apparently having fallen back asleep with his hand over Kei’s eyes. While he appreciated the thought, really, it was with thinly veiled disgust that he grabbed the hand that had awkwardly fallen on his shoulder and returned it to the unconscious boy.  

“Aha!” Yachi cheered, sliding the shirt on before fiddling with her nightgown under the sweater she had grabbed. Within moments, she removed an arm and yanked the nightgown completely out through one of the arm holes.

Kei stared. “I’m caught between being amazed and confused.” And got two other “same”s and a snore for his efforts. 

Yachi laughed, a sweet sound like the open air whistling above them. “I’m just happy you complimented me sincerely.” 

He frowned. “I can compliment people sincerely. I just don’t do it often because people are idiots and don’t deserve it.” 

Yachi touched her chest in a ‘I’m touched’ motion while Hinata whined, sounding oddly like a puppy. “That’s just cruel!” 

Yamaguchi decided to butt in that moment, eyes wide with innocent curiosity. “But you compliment me all the time?” 

Hinata’s following uproarious laugh somehow managed to even wake Kageyama, leaving him to dazedly blink at the giggling driver and the confused Yamaguchi next to him. 

“I’m going back to sleep,” he groaned, smushing his face back into the seat in front of him. 

 

“Tsukki, look, look!” 

Kei groaned, rubbing his eyes tiredly. While he wasn’t sleeping, he still had fallen into a comfortable doze. Key word: comfortable. As in he didn’t want to be woken up for this nonsense. 

“Please, Tsukishima-kun?” Yachi’s voice chimed in, and with how much the petite girl put up with the idiot duo’s nonsense, he figured he could, for once, allow himself to be bossed around. 

Blearingly opening his eyes, he was immediately blinded by a light to the east. Hours of driving with only streetlights could do that to a person, he supposed. 

“It’s the sun!” Yamaguchi cheered, eagerly clambering against the window with Yachi hanging off his back. Kageyama was surprisingly awake, and even looked a bit excited at the light curling around the horizon he could see past the buildings in the distance.

Kei chanced a glance around the surrounding highway and, though it wasn’t much, he could definitely tell there was more traffic as they drove through the more heavily populated section of Japan. 

“We’re about a half hour out of Utsunomiya,” Hinata answered when he asked, flexing one of his hands around the steering wheel. Kei frowned, but didn’t comment, making a mental note to address it later. So, about two hours out then. 

“By this time tomorrow, we’ll be in the middle of the ocean.” He turned around in his seat to face Yamaguchi, catching Kageyama pulling at his bangs with a disgusted expression. Like him, Kageyama had chopped off some of his hair in a weak attempt at disguising himself, though it was only really noticeable in the bangs area, which were pushed to the side instead of hanging straight down. “Quit it.” Kei called, brushing the uneven strands out himself. It was bugging him, that’s all. 

Kageyama shot him a look that spoke volumes of how out of character he was behaving and, with a half smile that looked something more out of horror movie than real life, stole his glasses.  

“That’s for the King comment,” he smirked, shoving the glasses on over his own face. Kei made a swipe for them, but he simply ducked out of the way and his hand met a volleyball instead. 

“I have contacts, you know!” Kei retorted, swiping at the blurry smirking figure in front of him. Yamaguchi, the most wonderful person on the planet in this single moment, saved him by quickly yanking them out of Kageyama’s iron grip. Kei sighed, already reaching a hand out for them to be returned, but wasn’t ready for Yamaguchi to instead slip them on his own face with a laugh. 

He glared, but the effect was severely diminished when he wasn’t quite sure where Yamaguchi’s eyes were. Yamaguchi only laughed again, condescendingly grabbing his still outstretched hand and shaking it firmly like they were business men meeting for the first time. 

“It’s okay, Tsukki,” Yamaguchi snorted again, with Yachi nodding seriously next to him. “I’ll make sure you won’t trip when you get out of the car like the blind man you are.” 

“I’m going to kill all three of you,” he flatly told them all, but was ignored as at that moment Yachi decided it was her turn with the glasses. She slipped them on, and furrowed her face into an expression of utmost importance, which only really made her look like an angry squirrel. 

“My name is Tsukishima Kei,” she scowled, and he batted at her once more that she easily deflected. “I’m constantly constipated and hate everyone. The only things I like are dinosaurs and strawberry shortcake and I’m totally not repressing any childhood infatuations, nope, no siree.” 

If Kei wasn’t pretty much certain she was a godsend sent by the heavens themselves, he probably would have murdered her. As it was, he channeled his rage into sending a few barbs at Kageyama for getting him into this mess, which only resulted in the younger boy trying to yank on his shirt in the crowded car, only for Yamaguchi to practically dive over Yachi in the middle to intervene. 

“How am I the responsible one here?” Hinata cried in his lonesome, Yachi patting his shoulder in a failed attempt at comfort. 

In response to the sheer amount of bickering occurring between the hormonal and stressed teenagers, Hinata swerved out of the high speed lane at top notch speeds and into the exit lane, not even blinking at the screaming occurring in the backseat as everyone toppled over each other. Kei held on to the door handle for dear life, cursing Hinata and plotting several different ways he could kill the former redhead in what was possibly the span of .5 seconds as they took the exit, Yamaguchi feverently praying in the backseat to the gods above. 

Wow, never knew the boy was Buddhist. What a bonding experience. 

They whipped the turn, nearly crashing into the car in front of them before the car’s brakes squealed loudly. They swerved right into the nearest gas station parking lot, somehow miraculously parallel parking perfectly right in front of one of the gas tanks, the lot of them smacking back in their seats with terrified expressions. 

Hinata calmly turned the car off, turning around in his seat to smile saccharinely sweet at both Kei and the shivering mess in the backseat. “I’m going to refill our tank and buy us some snacks. Any arguments?” 

No one dared to speak and, without a word, Hinata climbed out the car - still calmly - and went inside the store. 

There was a moment of silence, before Kageyama wheezed a “I’m  _ so  _ sorry-”

Kei shook his head madly, terror still clutching his heart tightly. “No no, don’t worry about it-” 

They all shared a glance and promptly shut up when Hinata slid back into the car, dropping the keys onto Kei’s lap casual as can be. “Tsukishima-kun, be nice and take over for me, won’t you? I think I’m in need of a nap.” 

Without even a pause, he scrambled for the door, switching places with Hinata under his amused smile while the older boy went to fill the gas tank. 

“Let’s not do that again.” Yamaguchi near whispered, and it took a good long while before anyone dared to speak in the terrifying redhead’s presence again.  

 

The drive into Tokyo was held without much fanfare, though by that time Hinata had woken up from his nap in a much better mood than his earlier violent fit. Though now Kei could see why; it was  _ stressful _ driving with four other hyperactive teenagers, nevermind doing this in the dark.

“Ooh, do you think we can stop by Nekoma?” Hinata leaned into Kei’s personal space, his body angled so as to read the map on his lap but still be a nuisance. 

“No,” he growled out. “It’ll be out of the way, and may I remind you we’re on a schedule here? The boat leaves at eleven, if you forgot.” 

Hinata slunk back in his seat, before a quiet “Not even Fukurodani?” slipped out. Kei shook his head, but a glance out of the corner of his eyes gave him a preview of glistening eyes, and he knew he was doomed. 

No one would notice if they went the long way and passed by it, would they? Probably. Sigh, dilemmas. 

Yachi, the blessing that she was, agreed with him on this. “Sorry, Hinata-kun, but you know how it is. If we get stuck in traffic then we might not even make the boat and oh no, what would happen then I-” 

Yamaguchi patted her head, once, twice. “Calm.” 

Somehow, it worked. 

“What even.” Hinata stared at the duo in the backseat. “ _ How _ ?” 

Kei took the risk and glanced in the rearview mirror. Yamaguchi smirked back at him. 

“It’s a secret~” He made a waving motion with his hands, like one of those TV magicians. 

Kei hated those fricking TV magicians. And Yamaguchi knew it, the little shit. 

“How do you like moving to a place with no fast food, huh?” he muttered under his breath, and Hinata cast him a strange look for it. Then he shook his head, resolving to get this show on the road. 

“Kageyama,” he called, and got a nonsensical sound in return. “Can you start packing up? I want us leaving this car as soon as possible for transport, so we might have to walk for a bit, if you guys don’t mind. And even if you did, we’re walking anyways because I said so and I’m in charge of who gets fed.” 

_ That _ got their attention.

“Specs-” Hinata gasped open mouthed at him. “You wouldn’t..?” 

Kei let an evil smirk slip onto his face. Best to keep them on edge, after all. “Oh, I  _ would _ .”  

“Don’t you dare!” Kageyama jumped towards him, only stopped by his seatbelt and Yachi’s timely intervention. Such a blessing, he’s going to have to buy her ice cream for her efforts. Yamaguchi would have gotten one too  _ if it weren’t for those stupid TV magicians _ . 

The racket continued as an argument broke out in the backseat, and his annoyance level only grew with the racket they were making. When an arm, accidentally or not, whacked him in the back of his head, he was  _ done _ . 

“I will not hesitate to starve all three of you if you don’t settle the fuck down!” 

Things got quiet after that. Good. 

“Three?” Yamaguchi shakily asked. 

“I like Yachi, so she gets to eat.” 

Yachi fist pumped, to her seatmates’ horror. 

 

Kei could have cried when they finally arrived, having to be a couple hours early at the dock for the ship to board the car. Without any sightseeing delays, he had practically led them preschool style on foot towards Ogasawara Maru, just in time for pre-boarding to begin. 

“How are we doing this?” Kageyama slid up like the snake he was to the front of the group next to him, making Kei jump and spin around to face him. 

“Don’t do that!” Kei spat out, whacking him on the arm for good measure. Kageyama just smirked at him, the asshole. 

“What? Did I sca-” Yamaguchi elbowed him the stomach with a panicked expression, quickly grabbing his arm and yanking him up to stop his fall. 

“He controls the food.” Yamaguchi whispered fearfully, his eyes darting between Kei and the backpacks he had on, the one with the canned food. “Shut up or starve.” 

Wow. That threat still worked? Kei could’ve sworn it would have worn off after an hour, like most of his threats. He was impressed. Mentally, he stored ‘threats of food withdrawal’ next to his mental locker of blackmail and creative taunts that he totally didn’t think of at three AM preemptive to any important day, and even ordinary ones. Best to be prepared, after all. 

“....splitting up?” He overheard Yachi whispering with Hinata behind him, so he chanced a slowing in pace to walk beside them. 

“What’s this about splitting up?” he asked, and Yachi gave him a nervous smile that spoke volumes of how much sheer anxiety she must be going through. She must wanted to have saved her medication; there’s not going to be much of that where they’re going. Hopefully they’ll be able to establish a mail order and get a refillment on them occasionally. 

“Well.” She fiddled with the sleeves of her sweatshirt. “We kinda stand out, you know? A bunch of teenagers. So it makes sense if, we split into two or three groups when we get to the port.”

Hinata nodded eagerly next to her. “Yep! If anyone’s looking for us - they’re looking for five people, not pairs - it’ll throw them off.” 

Considering Yamaguchi’s mother, he wouldn’t be surprised if she would somehow manage to track them down. This wasn’t their first attempt at running away, after all. They had just gotten smarter. “You’re right,” he conceded with a sigh. “Yachi, Kageyama, with me. If anyone asks, Yachi’s my little sister and Kageyama’s her boyfriend. Yamaguchi, I trust you can come up with a backstory of your own and make sure Hinata doesn’t kill himself in the thirty seconds we’re gone?” Yamaguchi nodded stoutly, ignoring Hinata’s pout over having to be practically babysat. 

“Until then…” He slowed to a stop as they the sign for the dock grew in sight. Yamaguchi was pulling on his bangs anxiously while trading glances with Hinata. Yachi was practically humming with nervous energy into Kageyama’s side as the older boy draped an arm over her comfortably, the boy using her head as an armrest as he yawned. Hinata was smiling up at him, way too dazzling at the ungodly hour of the morning like the practical ray of sunshine he was. God, the man made you feel like you needed sunglasses, seriously. “You guys...take care. I’ll see you all in Chichijima.” 

Then Kei walked quickly away, not wanting to deal with the ensuing waterworks that were sure to happen. All of them were idiots, every last one of them, he swore. 

If he had a small smile on his face, well, that was his own little secret, wasn’t it?

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> It's only true bromance when your beta reader asks you if they're all poly


End file.
